tomatoes and brothers
by poisonlovely
Summary: /"Sasuke, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship."/


**A little oneshot for y'all... Ren-chan is somewhat back-in-action because it's...**

**SUMMER!**

**YES, LADIES AND GENTS, IT'S THAT MARVELOUS TIME OF YEAR KNOWN AS SUMMER! L'ETE (with accents) FOR THOSE FABULOUS FRENCHIES, EL VERANO (I believe) FOR THOSE SPECIAL SPANIARDS, SOMMER FOR THE GREAT GERMANS, AND L'ESTATE FOR THE INTERESTING ITALIANS!**

**And yes, my darlings, this is indeed a Hetalia/Naruto crossover oneshot.**

**WHAT.**

Romano's hands were clenched at his sides, his amber eyes darkened and fairly glowing with rage as he stalked through the hallways of the World Conference building, narrowly avoiding hitting into poor Canada.

The person who had gotten him into this fit of self-righteous fury was no one else but our good friend Herr Germany.

"Goddamn potato eating bastard... all he can do is talk with my brother and act so fucking macho... well, suck my balls, you stupid idiota..."

And then there was a very _manly_ scream and a bright flash of light, followed by a boom.

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO, YOU BLOODY GIT! YOU MADE ME SEND ROMANO TO A FUCKING DIFFERENT DIMENSION!"

"Well, your magic isn't always reliable, mon lapin~"

"AAARGH! STOP TRYING TO MOLEST ME, YOU FROG!"

"...honhonhon..."

**IN ANOTHER WORLD FAR FAR AWAY**

"AAHHHHHHHH! SPAIN SAVE ME- Hold on... WHERE THE HELL AM I?" our favorite Italian shrieked, clawing the dirt to get AWAY from the odd looking blonde in orange.

"WHO ARE YOU? I'M UZUMAKI NARUTO, BELIEVE IT!" said blonde screamed, making Romano jump back, eyes wide.

"Whoa, what the hell? What type of name is that-"

"Naruto! Stop making him nervous! He might try and attack you!" a pink-haired girl squealed.

Romano smirked,"Damn straight! I am part of the Mafia- AH!" he screeched as a random... blade... ish... thing that looked like something Japan would pull out of his sleeve appeared next to his face.

As Romano shot up and hid behind the first blonde kid, a dark-haired boy with hair that stuck up oddly approached him, another blade spinning around his finger.

"Who are you?" he asked coldly.

"...your hair looks like a duckbutt..." Romano muttered, eyes wide.

"..." the boy gave the Italian a positively glacial look as the blonde laughed. The pink-haired went to grab Romano's shoulder, glaring at him, but he was smooth enough to move away.

"Hey, hey, hey, Pinky! What the fuck do you think you're doing, grabbing onto me! I'm a Mafioso, dammit, and could kick your little pink-haired ass- !"

"Hey, who are you, to be threatening my students?" a silver-haired man popped into existence.

"WHAT THE HELL YOU JERK! YOU SCARED ME, DAMMIT!" the brunet screeched, jumping ten feet in the air and cussing at the man.

"Maa, calm down. I'm Hatake Kakashi. Now, who are you?" Kakashi said, waving a hand lazily.

"I'm South Italy, dammit!"

"...South Italy?" the pink-haired girl blinked.

"That's right, Pinky! I'm the personification of South Italy in all of it's awesome, dammit!" Romano smirked, striking a cool pose (no matter that he was hiding behind Naruto).

"...I've never heard of South Italy..." Naruto muttered.

Romano got blue depression lines, and went rather emo,"...dammit... I knew that all of you would fucking forget me in order to acknowledge my brother more... I hate it when that happens... even that goddamn jerk Spain..."

"...you have a brother that everyone acknowledges more than you?" the dark-haired boy asked.

"Shut up, you bastard. Yes, I do." he muttered, head hanging low.

"So did I. His name was Uchiha Itachi, and he killed my clan. I have sworn vengeance on him." the boy said in a monotone, nodding at Romano.

"...DAMMIT! FELICIANO WOULDN'T HAVE KILLED ME! HE'S TOO NICE, DAMMIT!" the Italy whined, feeling a kinship with the other.

"Hn. I would almost trade." the duckbutt, as Romano dubbed him, smirked. "Then, at least, I could kick his ass."

"I wish, but then all the other countries say that I'm a bad person... and then they all flood around dear cute Feliciano to coo at him..."

"Do you have any other name that we can call you, South Italy?" Kakashi broke in, seeing how the stranger was going off-topic.

"Yeah, whatever, bastard. I'm also known as Lovino Vargas, but I go by Romano, and that's what you'll call me, asshole." he hissed, slouching away from the other man.

"Well, Romano-kun, how about you board with Sasuke? You two already seem to have so much in common~" Kakashi crinkled his eye into a smile.

"Shut up, you old coot..." the Italian snarled, death glaring him.

"Maa... so violent..." the fwa-haired poofed away.

"..."

"Let's get going, then, if you're living with me. People will stare oddly at you if you wear that uniform,"the newly named Sasuke said blankly, starting to walk off.

Romano sprinted to keep up,"H-hey! You jerk! It's totally stylish and Italian!"

"Whatever. By the way, do you like tomatoes?"

"...I love tomatoes~!"

The Uchiha cracked a quick grin,"Good."

Naruto and Sakura sweatdropped as Romano and Sasuke walked off into a suddenly forming sunset, random music playing.

"Sasuke, I can see that this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship."

"Damn straight, Romano, damn straight."

*** hides* It had to be done;... It absolutely HAD to be done...**


End file.
